Song of the Day....

Does this illustrate my mood, my current state of mind?

"That's when I reach for my revolver
That's when it all gets blown away
That's when I reach for my revolver
The spirit fights to find its way
That's when I reach for my revolver
That's when I reach for my revolver
That's when I reach for my revolver
That's when I reach for my revolver "

I'm about to pop off to some co-workers, so I closed the door to my office to barricade myself and sweetly hum the above tune..la la la...

You've been warned...

I wish I had...

There was a moment while I was on vacation for my family reunion in August and I was with my mom and dad on the Oregon Coast and we were waiting (and waiting and waiting - do you remember that place?!) for our fresh fish lunch (which was worth the wait) and the seating was limited (especially for us wait-ers) and so my mom sat while my dad and I stood next to her and she kept on looking up at us to talk and I remember looking down at her and thinking she looked so beautiful - her eyes, her skin, everything and I thought - this is how my dad probably sees her. But I didn't say anything at the time and I think I should have. For some reason that stayed with me, because that's how I see her too - even when she gets up in the morning and her hair sticks straight up like an even crazier Don King. But it stuck with me because I should have told her right then that I thought that and I didn't, I just kept it to myself - everyone deserves to hear they look beautiful, don't they?

So I'm using my powers for good, not evil and I'm going back in time and correcting the moment and I'm telling you now. Mom: you are beautiful.

Daddy - did I make her cry? :-)

Things are changing...the seasons have definitely turned, haven't they? That little autumn chill is here at last, thank god hallelujah - no more heat, please. I may regret those words once the reality of winter(i.e. no heat in my apartment) hits me but for now, I like being able to lay on my couch to read and not feel sweaty even though I'm not even moving. That's nice. To not stick to the fabric - that's a good thing. Yes, it gets darker earlier and the leaves are falling rapidly from the trees, I noticed that in walking around this weekend, the world has seemed to tilt a bit and so the wheel has come round again and I get that feeling that I used to get at this time of year, that new pencilsbookbaglunchbox feeling - this is really the new year, not January 1st. I get a little nostaglic for that, I used to love picking out a new Trapper Keeper and getting my pencil bag in order and buying new school supplies (I still love going to Staples by the way, all the pens and markers drive me wild) and getting notebooks color coordinated with my folders by subject.

Out with the old, in with the new, getting used to different teachers and subjects and schedules and this and that, time for pumpkins and squashes, Halloween candy, warm apple cider - all things Fall. I spent a good part of this weekend going through stuff, throwing out, redoing, cleaning, organizing, just trying to get all this "LIFE" stuff, this "ME" stuff, this junk cleared out and get it all together. I think I'm getting there...surely but slowly. So much for this Monday Musing - it's just me with my mind all scattered, compulsive listmaker that I am, thinking ahead at what I want done, how much I haven't done, how much time has passed, it's all passed too quickly and getting quicker all the time and feeling oh so very Willy Wonkaish, I have so much time and so little to do...

SCRATCH THAT! Reverse it...

To my favorite Octoberish poem then!

Who
The month of flowering's finished. The fruit's in,
Eaten or rotten. I am all mouth.
October's the month for storage.

The shed's fusty as a mummy's stomach:
Old tools, handles and rusty tusks.
I am at home here among the dead heads.

Let me sit in a flowerpot,
The spiders won't notice.
My heart is a stopped geranium.

If only the wind would leave my lungs alone.
Dogsbody noses the petals. They bloom upside down.
They rattle like hydrangea bushes.

Mouldering heads console me,
Nailed to the rafters yesterday:
Inmates who don't hibernate.

Cabbageheads: wormy purple, silver-glaze,
A dressing of mule ears, mothy pelts, but green-hearted,
Their veins white as porkfat.

O the beauty of usage!
The orange pumpkins have no eyes.
These halls are full of women who think they are birds.

This is a dull school.
I am a root, a stone, an owl pellet,
Without dreams of any sort...

I said: I must remember this, being small.
There were such enormous flowers,
Purple and red mouths, utterly lovely.

The hoops of blackberry stems made me cry.
Now they light me up like an electric bulb.
For weeks I can remember nothing at all.
- Sylvia Plath

Recipes of the Week(s)

These are no biggie, but you know they required preparation so I'm counting them in my final tally once the year is done.

My first mini recipe involved sauteing veggies with olive oil and garlic and using lavender as the fresh herb - this one was all about using your nose while eating not so much about the flavor - I think lavender sort of tastes similar to rosemary so the main point about cooking or baking with it is to inhale deeply and eating whatever it is slooooowly. Heavenly. I love fresh lavender. I've made lemon butter lavender cookies and a tea bread before, but never used it in a savory way. I also liked it because it made me feel French (well I'm am French, it's part of my European Mutt Genetic Mixture - for those who are counting, I'm mostly German Russian Swedish French - or as Grandma would say "we are from Alsace-Lorraine" - with a tiny bit of English/Irish/Spanish)

Okay, now that my bloodwork is out of the way, next on the list is a cold sesame noodles with cucumber type thing from the Bitten Blog that was good - I still have 2 cups of the tahini dressing in my fridge (very tasty on salads or over veggies) but today I saw that this week's Minimalist sounds even better, so I may have to try it next - Soba Salad with Spinach, Edamame, & Miso Dressing.

Lastly, we have a a stir-fry kind of thing with a Spicy Miso Sauce - alas, I don't cook meat at all, but this tasted like fantastic BBQ sauce and I got to imagining that it would have tasted nice on one of my dad's super fat (and PHAT) hamburgers or on grilled chicken or something. I got it from the GOOP site (yes, we all despise her I know, she's just TOO perfect, isn't she? Eh, we're all just jealous) - I'm willing to try the vegetarian recipes she gets since she probably has superduper access to the better Veggie People/Chefs of the world.

I also tried her Burdock & Carrot Kinpira - using a parsnip instead of the burdock though - and I declare it also a Success!

http://goop.com/newsletter/47/

Now as the weather is cooling and it's officially Autumn (as of Tuesday evening - did you feel your life, the world, the Universe, fall into a wonderful harmony as all the elements & vibrations sung together in a blissful balance? Yeah, me neither) I'm going to ramp it up and get very ambitious with the recipes and be MUCH better about doing one a week. There's about 15-16 weeks left in the year - lets see how much damage I can do...

The Alice In Wonderland Conversation of the Day

Boss (Cheshire Cat): We need to meet later to figure out where we are.

Me (Alice): I don't think we are anywhere.

Boss (Cheshire Cat): That's why we need to meet.

“But I don’t want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked. “Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat: “We’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.” “How do you know I’m mad?” said Alice. “You must be,” said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.”

This was me on Monday night in my apartment...I was all peaceful, getting sleepy and ready for beddybyetime when all of a sudden, a huge fire breathing dragon appeared in my living room and it's a good thing I had my armor on and I was just sitting there, holding my sword and shield, waiting for some action. Good thing too my swordplay skills are up to par and so I was able to slay my foe, it dropped dead with a heaving gasp, a final breath of fire was exhaled and I stood weary but proud, the victor...

Okay, really, this is me making a mountain out of a molehill, a dragon out of a roach. Yes, that's right, I had a giant flying cockroach in my apartment, and though I did scream a scream and feel like sobbing, I had to be a big girl and kill it so I scurried for some shoes and my new can of Raid and the dumb ugly humongous bug disappeared and I freaked out because I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep unless I murdered it because I would just be imagining it in bed crawling all over me or dropping from the wall or ceiling on to my snoring, unaware head.

Oh, it was just too awful for words... and yet still, somehow, I'll go on...when I finally did see it near my couch, I doused the bugger with half the can of Raid and it would NOT DIE, it just went round and round in circles until finally collapsing, I'm still on the verge of tears because I was terrified the thing was going to take flight again and get in my hair and bring to life a recurring nightmare of mine but the dragon/alien roach was dead and now I was left with a more difficult chore.

I had to pick it up.

Now, when I lived at home, we used to kill bugs and put an upturned cup over it and leave it for my dad to pick up when he got home. I can't do that anymore, I'm the only pickerupper there is. It was so big and alien and had these long feeler thingies and hard fat shell, I just couldn't bear to touch it. So I got out my thick yellow dish washing gloves, took about 50 sheets of paper towels, looked at it, whimpered, looked at it some more, choked back some tears, psyched myself into how good I would feel once the demon monster was out of my apartment and then....

I just did it.

It was over... but see this is what I do, I make too much of everything, I immediately went into panic mode and said that's it, I'm moving tomorrow, I can't take this, I want some vodka, I can't handle anything, I'm such a wimp, Heather's so lucky she has Dan to do this sort of thing for her...etc etc etc

It was just a bug. Jeez.

I'm still moving though, just not until next year maybe and that's because my apartment building is so crappy and uncared for and that's why I see bugs in the first place, that and the walls are literally crumbling before my eyes. And undefeatable mold & mildew in my bathroom...oh you get the idea!

In any case, I'm keeping my sword close by at all times because you never know what lurks around the corner...

Earworms!!

I have 3 currently...one is all Vin Scelsa's fault, I listen to Idiot's Delight on WFUV most Sat nights and last Saturday he did a whole string based on or connected to Beethoven's Ode to Joy that led to Bright Eyes "Road to Joy" and I cannot stop listening to it, especially in the morning as I'm laying in bed, readying myself to GET UP ALREADY STOP LAYING THERE LISTENING TO THE 1010WINS YOU ARE GOING TO BE WAY LATE!!!!!

So I've been putting on my iPod right before I'm ready to rise and blast most especially the last part of the song -

"The sun came up with no conclusion
Flowers sleeping in their beds
This city's cemetery's humming
I’m wide-awake, it’s morning!!!!"

Which he is screaming..but it makes me do that in my head and then I feel ready to face the day...

Okay, second one goes along the same lines - lately I've been Beatle obsessed all over again and I seem to have "Helter Skelter" on repeat and it makes me want to scream in my head too- which I'm doing anyhow most of the time so it might as well be in song form, no?

Third one is "Together We Are Both Alone" by Nicole Atkins - love love love this song. Good for blasting on the iPod too, especially when she sings

"I dreamt of everything,
I tried to make this all right
It’s all right, it’s all right, it’s all right (repeat)"

It's just comforting to hear "it's all right" over and over - that's what I like best about this...especially on a day like today, I mostly feel like either kicking someone in the head repeatedly or hiding under my desk. I'm a little off, a little moody, a little pissed off at the world in general.

BAH!

Let me get back to work and my day and see if anything good can be salvaged from it...it's all right it's all right it's all right...

Happy Birthday Wishes to Snow White

Snow White!!!

"How old are you, how old are you, how old is my sister, how old are you?" (that's to be sung in the tune of Happy Birthday, of course!)

AND MANY MORE....on channel four... and let's not leave out... YOU SMELL LIKE A MONKEY...and YOU LOOK LIKE ONE TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Lots of love and hugs and blessings to my most favorite HeatherAngelSister!!!!!

(I'm just including this pic because I love the look they caught me giving...am I jealous of you two-fisting the liquor?!)

A Gross NYC Tale

So I'm sitting outside during my lunch break sipping on my fruit smoothie - lovely day, sun is shining, a breeze is blowing, not too hot out...should have been a perfect 20 minutes.

Should have been.

But then this icky corpulent dude with a long frizzy goatee came and sat near me. He lit up a cigarette and proceeded to hawk up lugey after lugey and then would spit it up onto the concrete. After a number of spits, he turned my way and I could see he obviously wasn't a good spitter because some of the spittle was stuck on his disgusting goatee.

Fine - I was almost done with my break anyway. Let me just eat my banana in peace and then I'm gone.

Along came this other guy who asked Icky Dude for a light - he just shook his head and said he didn't have any more matches. So the guy asked well can I use your cigarette to light mine and Icky Dude declined. So the other guy sets down his coffee cup on the planter where we are both sitting and goes over to another group of smokers to get a light.

I get up to leave but as I do, I see Icky Dude lean over and SPIT in the guy's coffee cup!

THE NERVE.

And I feel bad because I couldn't see where the coffee cup guy had gone and I had to head back to work - so I just prayed that he didn't take a sip of the coffee, I hoped to God he was finished with it...I'm gagging at the thought of it...but it's his fault for setting it down there...isn't it? Or am I a bad person for not sticking around to warn him? This is NYC, you can't do that here!! At the very least, a pigeon might poop in it, not to mention an Icky Dude spitting in it.

THE END!

Recipe of the Week: Red Lentil Koftas

Ah, a Turkish dish! And this dish was (is) delish! I say IS because this recipe makes for quite a huge batch and since it's only me eating it, I guess it's dinner for the next week. Which is just fine, I don't always feel like cooking or preparing much when I get home - which is why there haven't been too many recipes of the week this summer - I find myself just eating salads and those are boring to post here or eating frozen fruit because it's been so hot since I got back from vacation and who wants to labor over a hot stove? Not I. I've barely been able to muster the strength to chop wood and carry water, let alone chop veggies and boil water.

So, I've been meaning to try my hand at this for over a year - I had something similar at a restaurant in Astoria (where they were called Red Sonjas and yes I mainly wanted to make them based on the cool name) but also because they are quite yummy. So click HERE for the recipe I used - with a few alterations because I wanted that Emerilish BAM! factor. I used a whole can of tomato paste, a spoonful of hot sauce and I upped the fresh spices - I used a ton of fresh mint, not a teaspoon of dried, I used almost all the fresh parsley and dill I bought as well - and I think that it benefits from being made ahead of time - the next day, it was totally BAMMING!! One thing I would do differently is cook the lentils in some stock so that they are saved from being boring - I just added some chicken bouillon at the end instead of seasoning with salt.

When it's all cooked and cooled, you just form them into little balls and put them in the lettuce leaf, wrap it up like a taco or dumpling, et voila, you've got yourself a tasty Turkish delight. Enjoy!