I love Happy Bunny...

So spring has sprung into fake summer and now we turn back again into our typical April self. 85 degrees last weekend, up to 90 on Tuesday and now I'm back to a turtleneck and lite jacket - I prefer a day like today. Not sweating, not shivering. Almost perfect, but not quite - you know that Shel Silverstein poem? The little girl was never satisfied her whole life and said that over and over and when she died and went to Heaven, a voice could be heard "almost perfect but not quite". I do enjoy going to sleep with the window open and then waking up to a chilly breeze blowing my curtains - the air feels fresh and it's such a peaceful way to announce "hullo, it's morning so rise and shine, sleepyhead..."

Where does the time go? I feel like it was just January and now half the year is gone. It's all going by too fast for me - I think that's part of the funk that I'm in lately - is this something that happens to you as you get older? Gather ye rosebuds while ye may type of thing? Carpe Diem, I know. I've always tried to remember that, each day, but it isn't always my strong suit - I get stuck in my head a lot, dwelling on it all or trying to figure it out (whatever the "it" of the day is). Still I try and that whole trying bit counts for something.

To fully appreciate the Springiness of Springtime, I bought some artichokes and asparagus last night. Artichokes make me think of two things: first, a joke my parents used to tell that no one can remember - "Artie chokes 3 for a dollar at Safeway!" was the punchline. Secondly, it makes me think of eating these as a kid and how it was exciting, a treat, a whole big production because it's messy, you need bowls for the butter and bowls for the discarded leaves, it takes a long time to eat (i.e. SAVOR) leaf by leaf and then you get to the heart of it and I would refuse to eat that part because it was called the heart and I just thought that was awful, how could you eat someones or somethings heart? So I'd give it to my dad and he'd devour it with glee and I'd think "Daddy, how could you"?

What a sucker I was, yes, in those days I gladly gave him my artichoke heart to eat, thinking it disgusting. He never said a word to convince me otherwise. Years have passed and at some point, I did indeed eat my own heart and discovered why he kept silent. The heart is the BEST part, the most yummy.

So I say again, Daddy, how could you? For shame, not sharing the wisdom of the deliciousness of the artichoke heart with me!

I think I'm just in need of some fun, some time off from my life for awhile - my boss pointed out the other day (when I was sort of scattered and airheady and giggly for no reason and I think he thought that I'd lost my marbles a little) that I haven't had a day off since I came back from Xmas in January and that's what's troubling me - I'm worn out,people! So My Texan Adventure next week seems like medicine - I'm really looking forward to it - I get Prime Veronica Little Buddy Time, I get to see a completely different country - um, because you know Texas is another world. At least that's what their tourism board commercials spout. And we get to have a bit of a road trip to San Antonio for Cindy's wedding and then back again.

Let me just tell you a side note about how I got to be friends with Cindy (and through her, Veronica, but not til a few years later when we were both "returning" students). She and I bonded over our anti-social behavior. It was our orientation week our First Year at Barnard - at Barnard, they call it First Year, not FreshMAN year. Of course. And every day and/or night had a theme and one night was Club Night where everyone at Barnard and Columbia went to the Palladium. So NOT my scene. Can you see me there circa 1992 with my Morrissey tshirt and Doc Martens, with cheesy 90's dance music like C & C Music Factory blasting? Marky Mark & The Funky Bunch? It wasn't going to happen. So I had only met a few people at this point, one of which was Cindy's roommate. She knew I wasn't going and told me that her roommate wasn't into it either and maybe we should hang out since it seemed like we were the only two First Years not attending Club Nite. So Cindy and I were introduced and thus a beautiful friendship was born and I do believe we spent the whole night sitting in my window - which overlooked the subway on 116th and Broadway, watching people come and go, probably making fun of them, or making up stories about them at least.

Good times, good times (say it like the NPR ladies)...and next week will just bring more of the same, more memories and stories, I'm sure.

Boy, this post was wordy - this is what happens when I keep it all inside and don't BLURT it out here more often.

Note to self, must BLURT more often...

Flickers, Butterflies, Robins, Mr Softee and Me

A summery spring weekend - the weather was actually okay by me, despite my earlier griping about it being too hot too soon - there was no humidity, so I didn't suffer when I was out and about. Mostly, I did a whole lotta nothing. But that's okay - I feel like during the week, I'm always going and going, and so it's as if I need to get my center back on the weekends. I spent almost all of Saturday outside, reading and resting my eyelids (as Grandma Max used to say) underneath a tree in Brooklyn. I did make it out to the Botanical Garden as I wanted to, but was a touch disappointed because again, my timing is all off. Last year, I waited too long to go and everything had bloomed and died already because the weather was so funky. This weekend, not much was in bloom yet, not even the cherry trees, which was the main objective. I love the cherry trees and magnolias in bloom - nothing is more glorious then to walk under them and have a little breeze blowing and knocking the blossoms off so it's as if there's pink snow falling. Still, it was pretty and I found a quiet spot under a tree by a little creek to read and peoplewatch and be peaceful. And there were flickers in my tree - which a birder told me was a type of woodpecker, otherwise I would have just referred to them just now as "those noisy birds in my tree" - and a million robins and the first butterflies I've seen yet. I stayed until 6 or so and then bought a Mr Softee chocolate and vanilla swirl and sat outside the museum - it was almost as relaxingly good as a day in Cayucos-by-the-sea. A spoonful of sugar-type medicinal kind of day.

Just what the doctor ordered.

Plus, the Red Sox swept the Yankees - I ALWAYS enjoy that...the Mets...well, we won't talk about that yet...talk to me in June and we'll see how I feel about them then. I feel like they are still finding their way - it is only the first month of the season, so I'm willing to give them some time to work out the kinks.

Plus, I had a nice long phone chat with my Snow White Sister - she always makes me laugh and smile.

Plus, its only 10 days until my Texas Adventure...

Plus, plus, plus...lets see what else this week will bring...only good things I hope - I need more of them, please dear Universe - thank you in advance!

Recipe of the Week: Fennel & Orange Salad

Last week, I was too crazed and weary so I didn't do any sort of cooking - at least anything special - so I didn't stick to my ONE NEW RECIPE A WEEK rule that I set for myself. But as I prepared the following recipe last night - after a bit of a crazy/somewhat moody day for me - I realized something: it makes me feel better and calms me to do this, even something as simple and as quick as this little salad. And because it's really healthy and super tasty, I'm also taking care of myself and I know when I'm going through my not-so-high-on-life times, taking good care and making yourself feel special is important. Plus, you feel like you've accomplished something in a small amount of time. Cut, peel, toss, follow directions, et VOILA! You've got yourself a good thing. It's a mini-meditation too, something to focus on completely and forget what stresses or ails you at the moment.

And yes, I did get this from the Gwyneth Paltrow GOOP website, but it's Mario Batali's recipe, a touch altered by me. I added walnuts since I had them and was craving them and I love the combo of walnuts and orange together. This was my first encounter with fennel - turns out, I love fennel! First, the way it smells is ridiculously lovely but it has a mild taste (I think) so don't be put off if you don't like licorice or anise. I think I need to find a roasted fennel-type recipe soon.

Fennel and Blood Orange Salad
(a regular sweet navel orange works fine, I didn't find anything special about the taste of the blood orange, except that I had to make an extra stop when shopping for ingredients to find a fruit & vegetable stand that sold them - and yes, I'm whining, the stand is just across the street from the grocery store, but STILL)

SERVES: 4 TIME: 5 minutes

2 fennel bulbs cut super thin
1/4 cup fennel fronds (the wispy green leaves that look like dill from the top of the fennel - I thought this was unnecessary - it didn't add much)
3 tablespoons cilantro leaves - adds a good tang!
4 blood oranges - removing the skin was too much work, I just cut each segment up into small pieces
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
coarse salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste

Toss it all together - like I mentioned, I toasted some walnuts and let them cool and then added them. Wonderful, light, yet a whole bowl of this was my dinner last night and I was full.

Monday it was 45 degrees and stormy-rainy, today its going to be 70 and this weekend, maybe up to 88 - I don't like that. Be consistent, please. I'm not ready for summer hot and sweatiness, it's still only April. 70's is fine. 80's go away, come again some other day...in July. I think I better head to the Brooklyn Botanical Garden this weekend - if this keeps up, either stormy cold or stupidly warm, I may lose all chance to see the flowers and cherry trees in bloom and we wouldn't want that, now would we?

Worst Week EVER

It was really really really really really really really bad.

BAD.

Mostly just work wise but then I've had a bit of insomnia on top of it so that just makes it all that much worse. It began - as most weeks do - on Monday when I was given a project, a somewhat straightforward query/report request which I began right away. Halfway done, I leave for the evening, thinking "I'll finish it up in the morn". Wouldn't you know it, I get in on Tuesday - our network is down for most of the day so my files are inaccessible. Not wanting to waste time, I just start over, thinking OH WELL, lets be proactive and just forge on ahead, undaunted. I'm thinking I'm done with the request Wed morning but then I'm barraged with alterations, "can you bring in this, can you design it this way, can you remove these fields" etc. I was here until 8:30 on Wednesday fixing it all up. Then, weary me heads home, something is wrong with the Queens trains at 51st Street and I end up not getting home until close to 10pm.

All I can think is: Life SUCKS.

Then, we find out something is funky with our database, some of the data is wrong, I'm going to have to basically start over from scratch but I'm exhausted and almost in tears I'm so stressed out and I run to cry to my boss and tell him I just can't do this, I can't work on this anymore, I'm going to drop dead, I can't stay late again, I don't know what I'm doing wrong, etc. So he steps in, takes my files home to work on them and so saves the day. Sort of - it was good he helped me because he got to see how very near impossible this query was, how complicated - we decided the name of the query should be TheBigBitch.xls because the file was so massive at this point - we were up to column EQ! - and that I wasn't such a loser for having broken down into a puddle last night. I felt bad that I didn't "execute" the way I normally do and so I bought him a giant chocochip cookie as a thanks. Plus I felt really bad that he stayed up until 2am working on it. Then I did the second half of the file this morning - took me a good 2 hours and then finally I'm done, it's out and I'm still reeling, really, my head hurts, my blood pressure still feels sky high. I seriously thought I was going to have a brain aneurysm, I could feel my temples pounding because of the stress.

I need a glass of wine. And I need to sleep. And I need to have a nice, peaceful, beeyooteefull weekend. For next week shall come soon enough and who knows what lurks and looms ahead. The Boss is out for the whole week and so it will either be quiet or oh so noisy because everyone that would normally go to him is coming to me.

I vote for quiet!

So it's now 5:41 and do you know that I am just now waking up? I mean, I'm at work and have been out of bed since 8:30 or so, but I've been in a weird/altered state all day - very groggy, as if I never quite got out of the dreams I had been having prior to waking up. This has actually been going on for about a week but today, it was particularly worse. I've been having super duper heavy sleep with strange/ugly/bizarre dreams/nightmares - they aren't really nightmares, but they are beyond vivid with somewhat disturbing images - last night had me at work but the space was more like a large loft and there were these awful maimed and bloody homeless creature-like people coming in asking for help - they all looked like even grosser versions of Sloth from The Goonies:

Nothing particularly scary happened there, but they were just...icky.

When I woke up, I just felt very heavy and slow moving and I kept doing things wrong or making mistakes - like getting on the wrong train to get to work - I ran to just make it and as we're moving along, I realize I'm on an F not an E.

Shit.

But no biggie, I just get out at 63rd and Lex and walk the 4 blocks to the 6 and get to work no later than usual really and then I had a sort of complex query to work on and I have my own handwritten instructions in front of me on how to do it (because I only have to do this once a month and I just knew I'd forget) and I'm looking at it like its been written in hieroglyphics. Took me a good hour to figure out "okay, how did I do this ever before, this makes no sense". I tried walking around a bit at lunch, thinking the nice sunny day and the fresh air would quicken my step - but no. And I'm all sore, my legs and arms, as if played tennis or something yesterday that I haven't done in a long time - why? What did I do during the night, exercise in my sleep? Is that why I'm all groggy and out of it?

It's a mystery... so just now, as I started this post, I woke up, like BING!!! SNAP!!! CRACKLE!!! I'm awake, I'm alive!

Now that I finally have the energy and the mind power, there's so little to do and so much time left in the day...

STRIKE THAT - reverse it....

Recipe of the Week: Banana Bread

I added walnuts and cinnamon because that's just the way I like it - and another one of Mollie's banana bread recipes tells you to soak the bananas in industrial strength espresso first - I think I'll do that next time, but this was pretty stellar the way it is - super moist and tasty and not too sweet. I'm already getting rave reviews from co-workers - at first I wanted to be selfish & keep it at home but since it came out of the oven last night, I've been picking at it WAY too much and fear it will be gone and I'll suddenly be 10 lb's heavier, so I brought it to my office where I seem to have some self-discipline!

http://www.molliekatzen.com/recipes/recipe.php?recipe=banana_bread

Cupcakes or Footballs and Baseballs Too

It was a co-worker's birthday today, so I made her some cupcakes that were supposed to be in the shape of Easter eggs...HOWEVER - there must be a trick to using this baking pan, they came out sort of lumpy and then once frosted with chocolate they looked more like footballs or bunny poop.

I got myself sick licking the batter, but as there is no Snow White/Heather here to compete with, the beaters and bowl are all mine...MWAH HA HA!!! I might have overdosed on the frosting too, and maybe, just maybe, taking a hit from the sprinkles. I'll put it this way, when I brushed my teeth before going to bed last night, my tongue was dyed red and no matter how much I brushed and spit, that pesky red wouldn't come out. Out, damned spot!

And its that time of year again, yes, it is officially Baseball Season 2009...I'm not feeling too great about my Mets, but I'll keep a low profile until June or so - then we'll see if I'm hurrahing or hiding. They sure played crappily on Saturday when I got to check out the new stadium for the exhibition game against the Red Sox, my second favorite team. The new stadium is AWESOME - very elegant I thought and laid out well, with lots of space and it's all open so no matter where you are, you can see the field and the game perfectly. But - there's always a but - it was freezing cold and so windy and stormy that we left in the 7th inning. We sat there as long as we could, shivering, but did you know that beer at 2 in the afternoon helps kill the pain of being uncomfortable? Well it does - for awhile anyway. I headed home and was literally so chilled to the bone, that I had to take a hot hot shower and ended up taking a nap because I had to get under the covers to warm up.

Today's another winner of a day -blustery, rainy, stormy - might have even been hailing a moment ago. In short, it's oh so very April. But if April showers bring May flowers, what do Mayflowers bring?

PILGRIMS!!!

hee hee hee... you know you giggled, despite the corniness

And hey, check out Satan's Facebook page - it's a RIOT! http://www.pcworld.com/zoom?id=162166&page=1&zoomIdx=5

P.S - In talking to my parents on the phone last night, I got my mother to start saying "fuck off, I'm fabulous" which only proves to me that the fabulosity is genetic because she decided that she loves that phrase as much as I do. And the fact that she said it while sipping a margarita only takes her to another level of coolness, n'est-ce pas? Now, my father may not appreciate her saying that to him, but oh well, c'est la vie - that's the way the fabulous cookies crumble! Anyway, he's fab in his own Chuckie way :-)

Recipe of the Week: Nicole's Leek Tomato Soup

The plan last night was to make leek soup - just leeks, nothing else. It's actually the trick from that book "French Women Don't Get Fat" - making leek broth is her method to lose some water weight which is not necessarily what I was after, but if lose a little puffiness, all the more power to those leeks o'mine - I just happen to love leeks and am trying to find the best way to eat them all the time. And I bought myself a food mill, so I'm still trying to get the hang of that as well.

I simmered the slivered leeks for 45 minutes or so and then saw that I had a bunch of grape tomatoes that were on the verge of going bad so why not use them up? Waste not want not. I sliced them in half and simmered them for another 20 minutes, adding a hearty shake of herbes de provence, a teaspoon of butter, a teaspoon of chicken bouillon and some pepper and when everything was squishy enough, I passed it through the food mill which was a little messy but I'm getting there. The broth itself was awesomely tasty - if had time to let it really simmer for a few hours, it would have been out of this world but it was already 9:30 and I was starving. And I think it would be rocking as a base for a seafood soup - it sort of reminded me of bouillabaisse.

So there you go, my own creation, based on no recipe with only on my own taste buds to guide me, but isn't that the best way?

I heart homemade soup!